Want to sell your work? Want to make more money? Would you like to know the secret to being published often?
When submitting non-fiction work, magazine articles for example, most publishers require the writer to query first. The query is a one or two page letter that gives the editor an idea of what you have or will be writing. It needs to be interesting, detailed, and give good reason why you should write the piece. In essence, you are attempting to "pre-sell" your work. A good query letter demonstrates the writer's ability to express an idea in a short space, while at the same time giving a snapshot of his or her style. This helps the editor to determine if the idea has merit, fits the needs of the publication, and will be interesting for their readers.
Understand that the idea you have for your story may be the greatest idea in the world. Yet keep in mind that for the busy editor your query letter may be viewed initially as just one in a few hundred, long before the great idea reaches the eyes of the publisher. So how do you make your query letter stand a part from the pile? You must have a great opening hook. Beginning with the first sentence, you must give the weary editor a reason to read on. What you say in the first paragraph can be the difference between a "Yes" and a "No" on the story for that magazine.
The Opening Hook
Go back and read the first three sentences of this article. Did it make you want to learn the answers to the questions? Of course, because being a writer you want to sell, make more money, and do it often. That was a good opening hook. The idea was to get your attention fast and entice you to read the story. If you are glancing through several articles, or scrolling down the list of stories on line, the first line in this article is bound to stop you. So this is your mission as well. Get the editor's attention fast.
The Hot Buttons
There are certain opening statements that prompt immediate attention: 1. Question (Did you know?) Here you are appealing to a basic human desire to know why. Look at where it got Adam and Eve. This is the "what you need to know" type of hook. The rest of the sentence must be equally strong. Did you know that there are only 30 to 50 wild panthers left in the Florida Everglades? A full grown male needs over 250 square miles of roaming space. With the ever increasing expansion of new communities being built more closely to the last greatest natural ecosystems in the world today, the survival of the Florida panther looks bleak. You've set the hook. All that is left to do now is to show the editor why this story would work in their magazine. Explain why you should be the one to write it, and what is to be expected if you get the "Go Ahead" nod.
2. Surprise Twist (The government thinks they have a secret.) This is one of the best opening hooks in all of writing. It just reeks of cover-up, scandal, which is a subject everyone wants to hear the complete details. These types of queries are targeted to very specific markets. For instance, a gun shop owner in Fort Myers, Florida was sentenced to 10 years in federal prison for selling an illegal firearm to a federal agent. It turns out that the weapon was shipped defective from the manufacturer and the federal agent lied on the witness stand. Even when the truth came out, the government refused to back away and still brought the case to trial and won. So a great query for an article for Guns Magazine: The government thinks they have a secret. If you own a gun shop, you can be sent to jail just so that the government prosecutor can save face. Send that opening hook to a gun lover's or personal rights magazine, and you will get a raised eyebrow.
3. Intrigue (Mary Butterworth is no movie star, but I'll bet you have seen her face dozens of times.) This hook makes the editor or reader want to know what is so special about this person. "Why should I recognize her face? Where have I seen her?" Mary Butterworth is the face on the bottle of Mrs. Butterworth's syrup. This article could be about how she was selected as the model for the bottle, why, and some most unusual circumstances surrounding the company. Such an article would fit well in a food or grocery trade magazine.
4. Anecdotal (Baseball legend Mickey Mantle recalls a time when he couldn't buy a base hit.) This hook does two things: It tells a story and it involves a legendary person. For the sports magazine, how and why will be most interesting for the reader since it is a true account.
5. Statistical (Japan consumes 10 times more fish than the U.S.) The facts speak for themselves. This type of hook works well in trade magazines where professionals read to learn the market place and the gain insight as to who, what, where, and how these facts impact their business. The statistics are important, and will hook the interest of the editor. Next you must offer clear and direct reasons why these numbers are so important and to whom.
6. Dialogue ("Read my lips. No, new taxes!") Who can forget these words spoken by President George Bush. This type of hook will definitely prompt the editor to want to know what he said and why. The quotation, especially if from a famous person, offers credibility to the idea.
Here is an opening to a query I wrote that landed me a sale for $250 in a New York magazine: He was known by local town's people simple as "The Leatherman". His strange life of seclusion and silence puzzeled many. The great outdoors was his only shelter, where he took shelter in humble caves throughout the mountians of Connecticut and eastern New York. For more than 27 years, the Leatherman roamed an unrelentless 366 mile circuit, which he completed like clockwork every 34 days. Who was this amazing man? What did he want? Why did he do it?
The opening hook is important in all that you write. Remember, readers are hungry for information and entertainment. Their attention span is short, unless what you have written keeps them interested. However, it is in the first few sentences that they find a reason to stay with your work or leave it. Editors are much the same. They have little time to read through all the ideas that cross the desk. You must "hook" them, then reel them in, if you want to sell your work often.
The story Creating a Great Opening Hook in Your Query Letter is Copyright 1998 by Michael Bavota.
The collection of works called Fish Eggs For The Soul is Copyright 1998 by Brian Rickman.
Copy edited by Sara Fawbush, editor of The Young Writer's Collection.